SuperHero God (3 min Read) by Roc Queen

Superhero God

We are the superhero generation... we have a “SAVE ME” mentality. But who could blame us? We’ve been watching GREAT Marvel Films for the last 25 years, it's practically embedded in our mental DNA. For most of us, when life gets hard, like really hard... we have somebody we can call on: mom, grandpa, friends, the homies, the government, SOMEBODY. Rest assured there is always somewhere we can go.

Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m lodged deadlock between a rock and a hard place. And if I’m really honest…this place is quite cold, very dark, and seemingly lonely. It also feels like I’m constantly under fire, all at the same time. And before you read too much into this, I PROMISE I’M OK!! Seriously I AM.

I’ve talked about it..I've ranted about it. I’ve sought counsel from the wise and the unwise ( haha… as my sister Rachel would say “consider your source”). I’ve even prayed about it, quietly AND out loud.. like really loud and dramatic. Snot ..tears, the whole 9. I needed God to know how serious I was. I stand here to tell you that I got nothing out of Him. PURE SILENCE 😑😂😂. I’m like God, you don’t see me down here struggling..you don’t see these flames getting bigger, you really gon ignore my call like that...woooow, and I thought we was cool.

If you can’t tell by now, I’m really dramatic.. and God’s not moved by my tony award winning performances. One day while I was practicing my lines for my next big performance, for my audience of one( hint-hint: God). I had this epiphany ...or as Aunty Oprah would say, an aha moment. I treat God like a super-hero. I want him to rescue me from each and every fire I experience..even the ones He’s trying me in ( get it..tried in the fire). Was my mind blown. And to think I had practiced all those hours for Him to just cancel the show like that.

But on a more serious note… King Solomon (my bible crush) talks about “gold being tried in the fire and character in the furnace of adversity.”  That whole “if you don't like the heat, get out the kitchen” doesn't work here, King Solly ain't having it. Stay in the fire, Play in the Fire ( shameless plug for my good friend Bianca ),  because there’s gold on the other side of it.

Is the fire uncomfortable? Yep, and it's hot, but it’s also holy. Holy in the sense of purifying and making us the best versions of ourselves. It's easy to forget or overlook the fact that God always wants the best for us and the best out of us, regardless of how it makes us feel. He doesn’t want our best to stay in us. Our best is to be shared and not harbored. 

I have so much gold in me (that’s Godfidence friends), and thats why I am always under fire ( I think 🤔..haha). And I don't want to harbor or abort my gold.. for my comfort.

So.. the next time you go through a fire, don't call on superhero God.. he probably won’t answer, call on the God of Grace. Ask that God, to give you the grace to go through the fire, and sustain you like the 3 Hebrew boys. And trust, that that same God is with you in it, He will never leave you, no matter how hot it gets🔥🔥🔥. And if that doesn't bless your soul...let this. (Clark Sister for the win. #FORTHECULTURE )

As always.. love ya!

Roc

 

"10" Perks of Singleness by Roc Queen


I have heard it over and over and over again that "SINGLENESS IS A GIFT". 🙄 It's not a nicely wrapped box with a big red bow on it. For the sake of my singleness, I’d like to interchange the word gift with perks, because it makes me feel a lot better about my current relationship staus, haha 😂. Ok I’m going to jump right into things, no fluff, the goods are below 😉!

  1. #1 is a given, I don't have to answer to anyone. If yal know me I have a strong "get up and go" spirit. I literally don't have to consider a husband or any children.  GO ME!  ME GO !

  2. When I'm home, I'm home. I am thee biggest homebody 🏠. I just be at home reading, thinking out loud, talking to myself (again if you know me, you know i enjoy my own company), singing loud and off key, and dancing in the mirror. What can I say, I have some free time on my hands.

  3. I have more time to think about and build Roc Queen, www.rocqueen.com.  I can hang out with my youth, help advance the kingdom whether that's serving with a mic or a mop.  All these things make my heart smile ( I won’t stop doing these things, single or not, I'll just have less time to do so).

  4. Ain't nobody looking at me alllllll thhhheeee timmmmmeee 👀. Seriously, that moment after I wash my hair and right before I straighten it, can be very SCARY 🦁. And sometimes my winter lip, bleeds into the spring 🙊 .

  5. I have young girls watching me. I am not around here, moping around talking about "don't nobody won't me 😭". I ain't posting provocative pictures on social media setting myself up for a thirst trap. I ain't sliding in and out of DMs  🏊🏾‍. And I'm not entertaining, engaging, or encouraging  passes from men who are not unavailable.   

    (TRUE STORY, Barb as my witness: I was in Chicago 3 weeks ago, and a married man took off his wedding ring and tried to talk to me. First of all I'm too single and way too observant for that. I saw the 8mm wedding band with a black matte finish, on his finger when I walked in the door (I told you I was observant).  AND just like magic, POOF!! It disappeared!! 🖐🏾🙅🏾NOPE, I'M NOT THAT GIRL🖐🏾🙅🏾).   
  6. I can change my mind about 15 times before deciding what to have for dinner, WITHOUT somebody getting mad at me 🤔🍕🌮🌯🍱🍝🍣. Forget it, I'm drinking lemon water... JK sushi it is 🍣.  

  7. Sometimes God wakes me up in the middle of the night and I don't have to whisper. It could be 2am and I'm using my 2pm voice. 📢 📢📢 YES GOD? REPEAT THAT, WHAT YOU SAY?....YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT?!?!?

  8. Ain't nobody checking all my purchases or my frivolous spending. YEP, I’M GOING TO ANOTHER BASKETBALL GAME, 🏀😝🏀!!!

  9. More time to prepare for my person 😍😍😍: spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, and mentally. 

  10. And lastly, knowing this isn't forever, and this season is a gift that has its perks. I don't want to treat it like a burden, it won't be like this always and when it ends, I don't want to be singing I woulda, coulda, shoulda. One day I'll be a happy wife, and a even happier mother. And I'll be ready when that time comes. So yep, there are perks..because when you say I DO, I DON'T should no longer be in your vocabulary. 

Love to ya,

Roc 😘😘

PS....Yal already know I'm gon make some King very happy 😉. Whoever you are... I LOVE YOU ALREADY.. hehe!

PPS... Married folk, don't come for me, enjoy your marriage and let me enjoy my singleness.

Settle Down, Saddle Up by Roc Queen

SDSU

Growing up I remember my grandmother watching “HER STORIES”... Guiding Light, All My Children, Days of Our Lives, just to name a few. And if I ever got stuck watching them with her, I was always so confused as to how she kept up with all the storylines. Seriously, every 3 minutes there was a new scene, with a new plot, with the SAME CHARACTERS. And what really confused me, was that my grandmother seemed unphased by each twist and turn. You can thank Margaret Joe, because of her I do not, and I repeat I DO NOT have a guilty please complex when it comes to reality-tv.

At 27, there are times I find my life somewhat parallel to the well known soap, “Young and the Restless.” O to be young, but I’m having serious trouble with the restless part. I think it may even be aging me, haha, JK. I don't look a day over 16, and 19 on a good day. I always feel like I have to be doing something: whether it’s leading in some capacity at church, another project at work, or grabbing another degree in my spare time. Rest assured I always find something to do, and I mean something. I'm learning, that I don't have to do everything, and sometimes I don’t have to do anything. You see restless living, can quickly become reckless living.

We live in a society that wants more, faster. And wants that new-new, sooner. Seriously how can anyone keep up? We’ve even confused progressions with busy-ness. We’ve managed to trick ourselves into doing a whole bunch of nothing, and because of it we are becoming experts at wasting. Yep wasting, wasting time and energy. As I keep living, because I’m going to keep doing that ( hehe), I’m learning the beautiful tension between ‘settling down and saddling up’.

Roc, what do you mean, settle down AND saddle up? How can you do both? Well settling down doesn't have anything to do with our location or staying in one place. It really deals with our heart, our attitude, and our posture in whatever season we are in. And usually when we keep ourselves busy, we are avoiding something. You would think that busy-ness would keep you pre-occupied enough to keep your mind off “that thing”, but it only breeds more worry, more anxiety, and more stress. PHEW, what is life ?!?!

And settling down doesn't advocate for laziness, quite frankly the opposite. Once we have settled down, not settled, we then saddle up. Saddling up is about stewardship, consistency, and faithfulness.  It’s so much easier to NOT stay the course, especially in a world that throws so many distractions our way.

Settle down in “A” church, and saddle up by serving the house. Settle down by choosing “A” career, and saddle up by learning, training, and growing in that field. Settle down with “ONE” man or woman, and saddle up to do life with that person, the good and the bad. Saddling up is also about having resolve and sticktoitness.

Sidetone: Do people even use words like this anymore ? I literally said this to my youth last week and they said “what’s sticktoitness” with a stank face...oh jeez. .

Any-who, God still honors faithfulness, yep faithfulness. Faithfulness lies dead smack in the middle of settling down and saddling up. Never forget that God is still the God of the burning bush, He still lights the flame, so we don’t have to go around starting fires (aka busyness),  we can’t put out ourselves. SETTLE DOWN, and SADDLE UP!!! In the words of Bishop TD Jakes… “get ready, get ready, get ready.” And in the words of Roc.. “be faithful, be faithful, be faithful.”

Faithfulness will forever be the currency of Heaven. 

As always, love ya!

Roc 😘😘


But be sure to fear the Lord and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you. 1 Samuel 12:24 (NIV)

SWEET 16 🎉🎉🎉 by Roc Queen

Hello hello, It's been a minute (or 350,400 but who's counting). What a crazy year, crazy good, but crazy nonetheless. But who doesn't like a little crazy...hehe. Wanted to drop in before the year was over to say I LOVE YOU (if no one has told you that today or this year) and share 16 sweet moments from this past year. 

Happy New Years lovelies...Roc Queen xo

  1. My very 1st mission trip in Oakland.CA with Points of Light Youth Ministry. The real reason I love the Bay so much is because the city is only a reflection of the people, hecca beautiful and hecca resilient.. 2017 finna be litty💡.
  2. MySpace, yep I reopened my account .. JK .. last year around this time I was looking to buy a house. Well, I wasn't able to all good.. all God, but I absolutely love my little studio apartment right here in the LA 🏡.
  3. Unashamed Book Tour... Felt like a low-profile rockstar living on a tour bus and hopping on and off planes for 3+ weeks. Stops included: D.C., VA, TN, OK, TX (Dallas, Houston, San Antonio, Amarillo), GA, LA, KY, CO, CA (SoCal & NorCal) 🤘🏾.
  4. Started my blog/website... I've always enjoyed writing so now that I have more time on my hands you'll be hearing from me more often ✍🏾.
  5. Launched a small business. #30under30 www.rocqueen.com/shopRQ 👑 .
  6. Sat court-side at the Lakers vs Warriors game ...AND I had a staring contest with Kevin Durant, what can I say the GOOD LIFE 👀.
  7. Serious hang-time with my best friends.. Ari and Daniela ... and D's wedding aggghhhh, she was so beautiful. STUNNING 👰🏻.
  8. Propel Women 2016 fall season: OH, MS, TX, & FL. All around good times 🚁.
  9. Family time: Smith Family Reunion 2016, Rachel's 25th, Thanksgiving, Christmas Karaoke. I feel like I have the best family 👪👨‍👩‍👧👨‍👩‍👧‍👦👨‍👩‍👧‍👧. 
  10. Watched my grandparents re-marry ( 3xs a charm)... it was really special, goes to show the power of forgiveness 👵🏽💞👴🏾.
  11. Despite the turbalence we witnessed a lot of history this year. OKC blew a 3-1 lead, then the Warriors blew a 3-1 lead, KD left OKC for the team that didn't learn from his mistakes, & Westbrook was petty about it. Ooo yeah and Trump was elected President #ballislife 🏀. 
  12. Read some really good books: swank life 101, play with fire, living civil, power of broke, girl code, sun stand still, unashamed, how to win in business, how's your soul, just mercy, extreme ownership, the leadership challenge 📚.
  13. My cousin/brother Brody Brown put out a great album and I was proud ...like really proud, you may have heard it 24K Magic - Bruno Mars ANDDDD Adele sung a song he pinned at the Grammys 💽.
  14. Said a GOODbye to a wonderful 5 years with Chris Caine Ministires & A21, seriously some of the best years of my life... I am better because of that place... mamba out, Obama out, Roc out ... drops mic 🎤 .
  15.  Lessons Learned: 1. Being comfortable with being uncomfortable 2. Happiness is relative, never chase it, let it chase you 3. Being "all in" doesn't mean it's "all on you" 4. You have your whole life to figure out your life 5. Baby, you're a Queen 🤔.
  16. GOD KEEPING ME. Yoooooo, He kept my mind when I wanted to go crazy. He kept my heart still when I wanted to run away. He kept my soul from growing bitter. He kept my body from physical harm and danger. He kept my eyes from wondering. He kept my feet on the right path when I wanted to go astray. He kept me smiling when I wanted to cry. So, I'm most thankful for his KEEPING POWER! Never let go God, keep on keeping me 😇. 

All that to say, 2017 will be ... 😊. 

BONUS to start 2017 off right: 

  1. Co-leading youth at church with this Beauty .. yal she's nothing but pure gold and black girl magic. God's got great things for you Vonna stay the course! 

LEMONADE [PT. 3] >> HOSEA + GOMER EDITION by Roc Queen

LEMONADE [PT. 3] >> HOSEA + GOMER EDITION | ROCQUEEN.COM

Honey, there is so much tea on this subject in the Bible, but let’s just look at one more story. This one is probably the most famous episode of cheaters in the Bible, Hosea and Gomer. Out of all the stories, this one always has me thinking why would God do this to that sweet ole man. Like don’t you hate to see the good guy go out with so many losses. Hosea was a lot like the Derrick Rose; poor kid just can’t catch a break. And Gomer wasn’t no “lady in the streets, freak in the bed” type of wife. She never got the whole “turn it off, when you're in public thing” down pact. Hosea had to go and pull her out of a couple situations, poor guy 😒 .

Here Hosea is, a Prophet, who was told by God to MARRY A PROSTITUTE. Marry the girl, all your boys been with 😑 . And he did, and he fell hard for her, like real hard.  Let me tell you, that love thing ain’t no joke. Honey it will have you doing things out yo character. I mean all of the “I would nevers” quickly become the “I can’t believe I just”. And that became Hosea’s life, doing the back and forth with not only his wife, but the mother of his children. I couldn’t imagine the kids asking where mom was, and Him having to stomach a response. Remember, Hosea is the good guy, so what do the good guys do? They give you chance after chance after chance. 

God used Hosea’s dysfunctional love life, to portray His unconditional love for His people, Israel. And really to show us that we all have cheat in us. We can’t look at Gomer with eyes of judgment because she is us. We are the prostitute, we are Gomer, and God’s grace and love always takes us back, no matter how much we cheat, no matter how much we promise that it won’t happen again, no matter if we show up to the counseling session or not, NO MATTER WHAT. He means it, when He says it “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” And He’ll do just that... stay with us and take all our lemons and make that good ole Chick-fil-a lemonade honey.

Before I get all in my feelings and go listen to my Queen, dear sister Whitney’s “I Believe in You and Me,” let me say this and be done. I have seen marriages work, and I have seen them not work out, I have seen people reconcile within their marriage, and others be reconciled with the idea of “marriage” (another try with a different mate). This is how I see it, if it’s a God thing, He’ll make it good thing. That’s neither tea nor lemonade. That’s living water!


Storyline found in: Hos 1:1-Hos 1:11, Hos 3:1-Hos 3:5

GRACE+TRUTH (N) LOVE=JESUS

ROC

LEMONADE [PT. 2] >> JOSEPH + MARY EDITION by Roc Queen

LEMONADE [PT. 2] >> JOSEPH + MARY EDITION | ROCQUEEN.COM

Ooooo another one is Jesus’ parents duh, talk about scandal… thee beloved Mary and Joseph, served us up some real SWEET tea. When the virgin Mary gets pregnant by the “Holy Spirit”, I just know Joseph was like.. “Seriously Mary, that's the best you can do..you gon really try to play me like that. Here I am trying take you as my wife, and you gon sit up here and tell me THE HOLY SPIRIT GOT YOU PREGNANT… For real!”

He was hurt, but I would be too. I mean not only did he think she was lying about her little rendezvous with the Holy Spirit, but her lie wasn’t even good. She was, as Beyonce would say: CRAZY.

SIDE NOTE: I know boys hate falling for crazy girls.. I know they be like “I would leave her.. but she crazy, 😂😂😂.

But here’s the thing, when it’s a “God thing”, God will show up and intervene on your behalf. He will settle your spirit about false accusations, He will clear up any rumors, He will affirm what He has already confirmed in you. And He did just that, before Joseph completely called off the wedding, God appeared to Joseph in a dream and dealt with him accordingly. He whispers to Joe, "It was me, the Holy Spirit, who impregnated yo girl". I mean how can you argue with that kind of clarity. I’m sure Joseph was happy to hear that his soon to be wife wasn’t crazy, OR he was thinking, now she got me going crazy. ( I know they hate it even more when her crazy starts rubbing off on them, 😂😂😂 ).

What I’m trying to say is, when you get into foggy situations, not just infidelity… you need to tune your spiritual ear to hear what God is saying. Stop listening to a whole bunch of naysayers; they only cloud your vision and your hearing. I mean you’re already foggy, why would you add SMOG to FOG..talk about dangerous.

God is NOT a God of confusion, and if you sincerely seek him on answers he will make things clear to you. And you might get a Jesus out the situation… ok let me stop, that’s a lie. And I bet not here nobody popping up with no new babies, talking about “the Holy Spirit is my baby daddy” I will most definitely side eye you 😏 .

Storyline found in: Matthew 1:18-25

GRACE+TRUTH (N) LOVE=JESUS

ROC

LEMONADE [PT. 1] >> DAVID + BATHSHEBA EDITION by Roc Queen

LEMONADE [PT. 1] >> DAVID + BATHSHEBA EDITION | ROCQUEEN.COM

Why do we love Beyonce so much? Because Bey consistently shows us why she will never lose. I mean, even when she’s losing she is winning. When life gave Bey lemons, she made Lemonade. And when Bey gave us Lemonade, we made us a good ole Arnold Palmer. We couldn’t miss our chance to have tea with the Queen B. For years we’ve been asking if Jayonce was a real thing, at least I have; especially after the whole elevator brawl between the in-laws. Lemonade is a creative expression of her personal journey of infidelity  (I THINK 😒, you know she love throwing curve balls 😂😂😂).

No but in all seriousness, I love what we are watching… Bey and Jay making good on their “for better or for worse.” I hate that we have so many people saying “I do” AND “I don’t”. Like seriously when you commit to something, do just that, commit. And if you're not ready to commit, do us all a favor, and WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE READY! And when you fall in your commitment before you quit, try. Try and make things work. But Bey ain’t the only one getting drinking lemonade it’s a whole bunch of lemons in the Bible, like David and Bathsheba.

Here we have two adults; in full on marriages and things get real sticky when David doesn’t know how to control his flesh, and dear sister BATHsheba forgets how to take baths inside the house like normal people. (Question before we continue...Was her real name Sheba, before David found her in the Bath?). Needless to say, Sheba got pregnant and Uriah, her husband wasn’t the daddy. Not only was there a baby coming, but David ended up killing him, because he didn’t want to do the whole “Jerry Springer” scene. You know the one when the friend comes out of side door and says “BRO that’s not yo baby, that’s my baby”.. and the wife starts crying..while David’s getting beat up and then Steve stops the fight before it gets too bloody. Yea.. he didn’t want to go through all that. So David, pulled a Lucious Lyon and had Uriah killed. And guess what; what God doesn’t do is, bless mess. Especially not mess we don’t confess. David and Bathsheba’s child grew very ill and ending up dying. Poor Sheba, she lost her husband and her baby.

But God is so faithful and full of grace that He won’t just leave you hanging in your mess. He sent the Prophet Nathan to convict, not condemn, David’s spirit of lust and greed.

SIDE NOTE: If you catch somebody you know cheating … before you say anything, ask God what you should do with that information, stop throwing tea parties and spreading people's business.

God is a just God, so He brings things to our attention. Sometimes in discreet ways and sometimes not so discreet (and most times we abuse God’s discretion and He blows things up, but for our benefit). When this happens, be like David; have a broken and contrite spirit about the situation. Don’t start shifting blame, talking about “daddy issues and how you never saw a man be faithful or how the other person wasn’t there for you when you needed them.” STOPPPPP, that only makes it worst. HUMBLE THINE SELF.. humility is everything.

Yes David and Bathsheba lost a son, but God gave them 4 more. The most famous son was Solomon (I just adore this man's wisdom), but they also named one of their boys after the Prophet Nathan. How cool is that? Talk about full circle 😊.

Storyline found in: 2 Samuel 12-13

GRACE+TRUTH (N) LOVE=JESUS

ROC

420, 421, 422 - NO REGRETS HERE by Roc Queen

I'm not afraid of lot things, I probably have about 3 fears, one of them being cats 😸. You can go ahead and call PETA on me, I will proudly confirm “I DON'T LIKE CATS.” No but seriously, one of them is “being ok with regret.” I think that’s one of the scariest places to be; that place where you lose your edge and become numb to wanting to be better. I mean that's all regret is, not being ok with something you know you could have done better. Some people regret relationships they’ve been in and some that they are still in, some regret past decisions and choices they’ve made, some people regret picking up bad habits they can't seem to shake. I think that we sometimes focus too much on what we regret, and we miss the beauty in regret, the silver lining.. because there’s always a silver lining !!

REGRET TEACHES US 2 THINGS >>

1 // Regret teaches us that we are aware (WOKE) to the fact that something is wrong. Mistakes are lessons...lesson we shouldn’t deny, lessons we should fully own. I have a friend who had a baby out of marriage, (I hate the word wedlock, no wonder people aren’t getting married...we call it jail). And one day we were talking about his son, and he told me something so profound that I’ll never forget. “My son was not a mistake, he was a MIS-TAKE.” What he was saying was that he doesn't regret his son’s life, more so the timing and the situation he brought his son into. We can’t afford to deny and disown truth, they tell us so much about ourselves. They are sometimes the mirrors to our souls and the gateway to our future.

2 // Regret teaches us that we are alive, so we can try again. You see, regret is merely a feeling about our reality.  Whatever it is you’re dealing with is a real thing, and what you do to avoid that reality is also a real thing. So before you create another monster you will one day regret... I say deal with it, face it, head on… AND TRY AGAIN! You’re life isn't over, and you're not a failure. A failures is a person who doesn't TRY AGAIN!

Let’s not be those people who miss the lessons in our mistakes, because regret will always be around the corner, CREEPING, like the creep squad or cats. Regret is the absolute enemy of grace, it wants to throw you in a deep dark pit where you feel bad about yourself. But grace, grace pulls you out of that pit, brings to light what needs to be seen. But it’s our responsibility, to see it for what it is and be honest about what we see.

Yoooo from somebody who loves you and thinks the best of you; as you pursue your next high, cause we all have something we do to get high, it’s not just a substance: porn, sex, cannabis 😜, food, money, control, gossip (yep.. some people get off talking about other people), WHATEVER IT IS. Think about it first, because getting there, that’s the easy part. The hard part is staying there, and coming back is even harder. We all make mistakes  and have things we regret, it’s what we do when the dust settles and the fog clears, that’s what counts. Cat’s have 9 live you don’t 🙀... YOLO, only once.. And your one and only life is way too short to live with regret.

2 Corinthians 7:10 MSG

Distress that drives us to God does that. It turns us around. It gets us back in the way of salvation. We never regret that kind of pain. But those who let distress drive them away from God are full of regrets, end up on a deathbed of regrets.

GRACE+TRUTH (N) LOVE=JESUS

ROC